I made a decision that reorients my entire life: On the inner scale of 1 to 100—from pain and fear to bliss and ecstasy—I no longer go below 85.

Not because I suppress the negative. Not because I want to “only think positively.” But because I’ve understood something profound: I am more than my feelings, ideas, identities, or manifestations.

The old misconception: I have to feel everything to transform it.

For a long time, I was convinced: I have to feel everything. Every emotion, every fear, every drama, in order to transform the energy. I thought I had to embrace the pain, immerse myself in it, let it burn through me to transform it. I believed that only by feeling the pain to the end could I truly resolve it.

And I’ve followed this path. Again and again. I looked at my triggers. I’ve dug through old wounds. I’ve held inner children, felt old traumas, and breathed through emotional tsunamis. But here’s the truth as I see it today:

I know my pain. I know my patterns. I know my triggers. I’ve lived through it all a thousand times. I don’t have to experience everything in depth to heal myself. I don’t have to revisit every drama just because my lower self pretends it’s real.

I acknowledge everything—but I don’t revisit it.

Today, my understanding is different:

I acknowledge all my creations.

Even the dark ones. Even the painful ones. Even the chaotic ones. I see them—and I love them. I admire the creativity and intelligence with which they were created. I see how every shadow was an expression of my consciousness of creation.

How every pattern was an attempt to survive, to protect, to grow—or simply to experience. But I no longer follow them. I no longer indulge in the illusions of the lower ego. I no longer chase after drama. I no longer have to “feel everything” to accept it as part of me.

I know what I am.

I know what I am no longer.

And that’s enough.

No more big drama.

I choose against constantly recurring downward spirals, against the endless reworking of old stories. I no longer need to “lose myself in the drama” only to find myself again at the end. I choose clarity, presence, and high energy today. Not as a spiritual trick. But as a completely conscious decision:

I am here to live my light. Not my suffering.

My soul has experienced enough. My family, my relationships, my field—they deserve me at my highest frequency. Not as a perfect being, but as someone who has committed to never going below 85.

Waves of Manifestation – Why High Energy Is Crucial

There’s something I’m perceiving more and more clearly:

Waves of Manifestation.

These waves arise from oneness. From this space beyond thought, beyond history, beyond lack.

From there, we receive the divine seed, the visions, that which may be embodied through us into the world here on Mother Earth.
And through this divine seed, conceived in our womb, we become pregnant, and the waves of manifestation build up, breaking at exactly the right time.

But for a manifestation from oneness to truly take shape, a stable energy above 85 is needed. Only if we remain permanently in this vibration – in joy, clarity, love, ecstasy – can these waves “break” and form matter in alignment with the Source, our soul, and the unity of life.

If we continually slip back into old patterns, into shame, fear, or drama, the wave shatters before it even arrives. Therefore, this decision is not only spiritual, but also practical. It’s about focus. It’s about creative power. It’s about responsibility.

Conclusion: I am more than my manifestations.

I’m not here to watch all of my inner movies until the final credits roll—especially not the movies of the lower self, which are complete illusions.

I’m not here to rehash everything I’ve long since understood.

I’m not here to lose myself in the depths of something I could have long since transcended—or in many cases, have transcended.

I’m here to shine.

I’m here to create—from unity.

I’m here to live beyond 85.

And yes: I acknowledge every single one of my old creations—with love, with respect.

But I don’t follow them anymore.

I am free.

Not because I no longer feel anything.

But because I’m finally choosing who I truly am.

Love always
Chris

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